u kneed laff after shitpile of presdiential debat? reed dennis perrin
By shag carpet bomb • Sep 27th, 2008 • Category: Election 2008, McCain, Obamadennis takes no prisoners:
http://dennisperrin.blogspot.com/2008/09/how-lucky-we-are.html
JIM LEHRER: Good evening. I’m Jim Lehrer.
LEHRER: You may remember me from an earlier age of TV journalism, when we transmitted official lies and propaganda to our educated audience in a very calm, reassuring way. When oil companies weren’t afraid to openly finance our efforts. Well, those days are gone now, lost amid all the shouting, sound effects, visual wipes, incomplete sentences, and the general hullaballoo that makes my aging brain hurt. Dear God how it hurts. Some days I want to just put a Tec 9 in my mouth and . . . (coughs). Tonight, we’re honored to have the two leading candidates for president of the United States. Let’s bring ‘em out here! Fellas!
MCCAIN: (whispering) I’m taking you out, gook boy.
OBAMA: (whispering) Step up, cracka.
LEHRER: Gentlemen, thank you for being here. As you both know, tonight’s format is designed to skim over complex issues and avoid talking about where the real power in the country resides. So feel free to pop off at will, regardless of facts or objective reality. Senator Obama, the economy. What’s your view?
OBAMA: Jim, I was talking to some of my Wall Street backers earlier today, and they’re hurting. This current crisis, started deliberately by the Bush administration with Sen. McCain as their dancing monkey, means of course that my rich and influential friends and supporters are going to need help. Lots of it. This is why I’ll eventually support whatever bail out is coughed up in Washington. But I want the working people of America to know that I’ll continue speak out of both sides of my mouth, will employ the term “Wall Street/Main Street” for as long as my advisers say it resonates, and will look good while doing it. That’s my promise to the middle class.
MCCAIN: Jim, what Sen. Obama is refusing to say is that neither one of us really cares about average working people. If we did, we wouldn’t be up here, surrounded by Secret Service agents packing some of the finest heat this great nation still produces. But it’s part of getting elected, so we go through the motions, say what our handlers think is best, and hope that it sticks. And you know what? It almost always does! I swear to God, the crap people will swallow in this country boggles what’s left of my fading mind. As I was telling my dear friend General Petraeus the other day, “David, there’s a knot on the back of my thigh. Do you think it’s a clot? Should I have it checked? What time is chow?” And that’s why overseeing an equitable bail out is so important to the economy.
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