training journal, 2009.01.27: feminist bookclub edition
By shag carpet bomb • Jan 29th, 2009 • Category: Feminist Fight Club, Training JournalI discovered a feminist book club in the area and went to my first meeting Tuesday night. I hadn’t read the book, but it gave me a chance to meet the women involved. It was great to sit around and talk, though I had a lot of disagreements. I found myself bringing in analyses that come natural to me: pointing out racial and ethnic difference, class differences; bringing up women of color authors. Mostly what I tried to avoid was drawing too much on research and theory.
At one point, someone brought up men’s power with regard to rape and violence. And then I wanted to say that my own experience with violence was more from women but didn’t because it felt so overwhelmingly heterosexual and they seemed almost fearful, as in, “omigod, is she a lezbean?!” I felt desperately closeted — but we’ll see.
So, needless to say that I only got some walking in:
Walking: 3.5 miles (to and from work; walking at lunch)
It was funny, the book the host has selected was more a self-help book — and she recognized that and worried that it wasn’t feminist enough. It was about being a nice girl and how to stop being a doormat. But, the organizer wants variety — fiction and non-fiction — and I think she wants to be accepting of the different needs people bring to the group. Next time, we’re supposed to bring in a book or four and then we can build consensus about what to read, instead of the host being the one to select the book.
I have figured out what I should try to introduce. There’s a big difference between what I want to read and what I hope other feminists want to read and what I think counts as a feminist book in this particular group. Which should make for an interesting experience! Right now, I’m just thrilled to be hanging out with women and making friends.
Oh! one thing that came up in this book was the way women deal with conflict. The author said, interestingly enough, that women deal with conflict by avoiding it yet, at the same time, almost exacerbating it by forming clicques and gossiping about each other behind one another’s backs.
My jaw nearly dropped. Sounds like feminist fight club! So, regardless as to what impressions I took away from this pop culturish self-help book, it sounds like it would be an interesting psychology behind what goes on in feminist bloglandia. Under pressure to be nice girls, we end up being mean girls!
interesting.
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